((the last post is related with this))
''Hey" , Z ( a student from my ex-class)said interrupting me while I was laughing, I with surprise turned and saw her. I replied with " hey".
- Oh, it is not your inhabit to respond like that. I got used to hear your wonderful voice saying very very warm hellos.. am I wrong?
- ah..mmm. well.. why should I respond warmly, you must be thankful that I responded. ( I said this with a great pretending to be like that way, it was too hard indeed, I have never answered someone like this..
-well, I guess, you moved to another class, why?
- why???!!! you say why??!!! you ask me?!!!! you are the ones who should realize the matter. Oh my God!! you ask me?!!!
- yes, look Soleil, let me tell you something. firstly, I really know how much you angry and i appreciate everything very well. what the girls did was awful, so awful actually.
( I began to listen attentively) but you remember it, you were standing responding to only four girls, who accused you wrongly and with very loud voice, and by the way, everyone knows how much jealous they are of you, how bad are they, and no one admires them like you. it is the real truth that no one can hide, the truth is like Soleil, like how you are, pure and great.
You were strong , you made them lose and everyone knows this, and it happened in front of our English language teacher, and if you were wrong the teacher would ask you to stop, right? yes right. but you -with all the right with you- might forget me, and many other girls in the class who love you, really love you.. many girls in the class love you Soleil and sincerely, because you are one, only one like you..
( my cheeks turned so red, and I so hardly could hide my tear)
I'm here Soleil, to tell you only one thing. we love you and we really miss you. I'm here and look there to those who are waiting for me to tell you.
( i turned and saw S, A, D, J, A, S, F, Sh, M,R, and Maf they were smiling warmly).
Would you mind coming back to our class? your mother class after joining our grade two years ago, would you mind? we miss your high and lovely spirits, your great and someimes funny comments, your ideas,your humor and decisions . your songs, way to talk and everything of you. I everytime stand secretly near your new class and begin to breathe your special perfume. the other day I breathed it and soon began to look for you.
After this talking, I had nothing to respond with,I was quite embarrassed, and I cried a little, I always get touched in this situations like it. I hugged her and from the deep bottom of my heart I thanked God that everyone knows.
For me, the human is about : soul, deeds , talking and reputation. this is what I denote my life to get the best of. I always think,today I'm standing on this area, tomorrow I may not, today I'm alive, tomorrow I might not be. i always work with the say " work for your life as you will live forever and work for your afterlife as you will die tomorrow" , I always do my best to make God's happy by making everyone around me happy.
-Z, i'm fine with my new class. I can't come back now, the headmistress has made the lists and I got my fit place. secondly, everyone in my new class loves me too and I'm happy.
-oh, you are happy?
- yes Z, yes.
- ok ok ,very nice. do you know what? i can't deny I'm so sad that you won't return. but if you are happy, so we are all happier than you, just because you are happy.
Z left with a smile...
What happened to me?
Various feelings, I was extremely happy, extremely embarrassed and confused. I hugged the tree and left it..
When I came back, I was wondering, I was contemplating my next new life, I was thinking of all the people I met.. I love those girls, no matter what happened, even though I got hurt. I thought again, yes I'm angry, so angry, but I can't hate them, I can't ...It may be a problem and may not, I'm ready to do anything to help them, if they need me they will find me.
I did many things, and the best I got as a return is people's love.
I told my mom about what happened, mom hugged me and cried a little, i didn't understand first.
she cried becuase she loves me and is proud of me.
Mom told me that a teacher ( whom I chose to teach me in a private lesson, and with my group there were girls of whom hurt me) and said that he was wondering if I'm planning to go back to his lessons, he said that he had a trouble with the girls and they talked badly about me in front of him too, but he didn't listen. although he has no business with the problem, but they just tried to make him hate me. They failed down.
Many times i don't understand people, why do they hurt each other? WHY???
Is this what The Lord asks us to do? Or may the human instinct them diffuses those bad desires inside them?!!!!!
Everyone has his/her own way, and I can never change mine.
I spent that evening making fun with my sisters, I made many funny hairdos , it was a great happiness after frustration.
I kept saying prayers for a long time that night before sleeping. I really adore God.
The next day, after a long day at school, i came back, and wanted to change my spirit , I wanted to do something, I was still wearing the uniform, suddenly mom opened the door, she had just come, I asked her about daddy, she said he brought her home,and went to the baker's. I felt sad soon, but I headed quickly for our house main door, daddy was not there, he had gone.
I took my way to our garage back. " hm..hm.. did anyone want to go with me to the baker's?" daddy said!!! he saw me through the mirror and came back, i soon got in the car, I hugged daddy, there was a young woman walking, she saw me, and guess what she said
" oh sir, how nice is your daughter? oh, her innocent face, sure , 12 years old! :D"
I was full of a surprise!! 12? or 16!!
Today, i kept listening happily to our national anthem as the scout girls were raising the flag. cool breathe is in the morning, and it is a breeze of new hopes...
PS, the situation is so-so. On Wednesday, the roads were blocked to our school , I need to walk along the street, there was an inspection in the neighborhood.
The nationla guards face so so hard circumstances, and many difficulties, but it is a wonderful sheen I see into their eyes..
I met teacher S whom I mentioned in my last post, and she kept talking to me for a long time, she is an onld ma'am and I really love to get expeience from people like her.I'm doing well with my exams and in school, I'm happy but so so exhausted :) :) :)