6 Nov 2009


The mascot piece has slipped away , it is so shameful that I didn't have an energy to pick it up. Coldness renders the fingers as marks of gooseflesh.
Since it is,
and it means,


Never did notice the monotony wraith baffling the brains wrinkles, stealing my concentration faculty.
Humble attempts to spin reeds instead of wool, normally, that would make pricks, so by any means, I can notice that wraith some soon minute.
So weird to say, but I recently realized that reed is better than wool in bringing warmness *passion* . simple stuff gives people life.
Reed.. Rain.. Iraq.. All of them leave a huge space when the true morales are not shown, and when the balderdash is appointed the chairman.
I miss Iraq while I am in my own Iraq.. *Crossroads*

Janus! The door is on the jar, waiting to release every freedom pleasedly.
"Random words.. so much to talk about especially that your voice echo still follows my hair waves everywhere I go.
Unstable desires explain good reasons , they were unforgettable days."


Thank you all, something you gave, so much could save.
Baba called us yesterday, the last medical report says that my mother is completely recovered..
Mama called us today, talked to everyone, I have not heard her voice for two months, things refused to strengthen the tongue to speak, but things finally have obeyed.
Thanks for everyone prayed for us, everyone thought of us, thanks for your support and encouragement. Thanks so much!

The mascot piece rolls..

We had many bad haird days, and we cried so loud. Now, we are happy, and we look forward to the future, look up to her name which is so high, which is saved in our hearts, our souls and which submerges with our blood drops.
The most precious person.

Balance of mind my mom taught us incinerates the difficulties. And I.. I did all my best, never kept any iota for me or my own.. never..

Like if the light kindly lolls down. A dark sky.. lightning.. thunder..
Oh, how macabrely thunder had frightened me! And winds storming used to tease me and lumber my chamber of confused intentions. But this time, all brought good news.
Pain matrix.. I know it is still existed..still here and almost everywhere.. But I need a pause, there's a jolt to let everything come to its suitable place. I admit, lately I found out I had established many places for anarchy in my life style and it led me to be in a very bad temper, so hard to create a "mutation", but the bright side is what I need is only "arrangement" and "mutation" will be very well done.

Altough it may appear so close to bring noise, but I just like it,

I'm so glad for my sister, I see her doing well in the school , I was scared to death in the beginning! As if it was my homework and my study, but she always hints to my past, and her usual and favourite question to any teacher in the first meeting is :
" Madame? Madame? Do you know my sister?"

*And talking starts about Sandybelle*

Nowadays, mightily I become happy to hold a textbook and keep teaching my sisters and giving them pieces of advice, as if you would understand completely that I was in love with textbooks..(Such an irony)!
What always gave me headache that may make anyone looking for a bandeau here or there to wear, now, it gives me happiness, especailly when I listen to their voices tunes praising my excellent (as they say) teaching and saying "Why don't you become a teacher? Why don’t you come to our class and teach us and our classmates there? We all will get the full marks!".. With great honour, I repeat it again, "spoiled sisters".

Every day my sister brgins me my teacher's greetings and best wishes, with offers of help, because I was not only a student, not only a friend, not only a daughter , vut also someone they all feel proud of and remember with smiles. They remember all my banterings.
It was my jaw breaker to say "I love the school" , but now, I really do say it with such a confidence, " I love the school".

Hmmm ,something else I should admit, I AM IN LOVE WITH TEACHING and really it is one of my dreams to stand before a bunch of students and drawing many letters on the board ;however teaching devices have developed and maybe in my time there'll be no need for a board pen in Iraq.
*but* I AM IN LOVE WITH MEDICINE TOO, my mom has actually solved it by saying " you should study so hard so you can be a professor in the college, you'll find many students to teach there. Like me and your dad" she is totally right with this, and I'll be free with any teaching way I take on.
However, I made my choice, it's so hard, medicine , the goal that tells to sacrifice and remember the humane feelings that some people almost forgot.
Only what remained of this holiday الي مفتهمت منها شي طبعا
Is *one week*, and I think I'll spend it by : sleeping, cooking, playing by the jigsaw puzzles and lamenting my destiny that I couldn't go to the amusement city to enjoy the merry-go-round :D

Many things became like a so far mirage, it only helps to mull and put an end by a conclusion, there are other miens we have.

There is a city I pray to visit, where I like to wear alabaya with two books , some places to long for and stay in for a very long while. Just to feel a right I really innerly miss..
The other night, covering my little sister with a thick blanket , I could know it.

this post was written last night, when I received an unexpected email from someone I love so much.